Krippendorf’s Tribe

This movie would’ve been aptly titled “Crippled Dork’s Bribe”! Who the hell had the bright idea to cast Richard Dreyfuss in anything other than a soup commercial? This guy has the charm and charisma of a sneaker full of dog shit. Wasn’t he abducted by aliens in Close Encounters? It proves that there is intelligent life out there. They were smart enough to drop his dumb ass back off on earth and keep Elvis for themselves.

This film,(more like soap scum) stars Goofus, I mean Dreyfuss, Lily Tomlin, and a bunch of other people I’ll never forgive for signing onto this cinematic train wreck. Jenna Elfman (of Dharma & Greg fame) co-stars. I don’t think this movie would be viewable even if Jenna Jameson starred in it. Well, maybe if she got nekkid and had a love scene with Jenna Elfman. So far we have a weak cast, led by Dick Dreyfuss.

Now, onto the plot, or lack thereof. DICK stars as some sort of archeology professor or something. He submitted a request for a research grant from the university he teaches at to study a “lost” tribe. Unfortunately, the only lost tribe I saw was the acting coaches. The university’s review board asks for a lecture on his findings. To noone’s suprise, Professor Krippendorf hasn’t discovered anything other than his crappy acting. So, he devises a plan to use his family as the “tribe”. They put on some grass skirts, smear mud all over themselves (here’s where Jenna Jameson would’ve ruled!!) and jump around their back yard like a bunch of rednecks that found dental floss. He films it with his super 8 camera and submits it as his research. Yawn! Let’s try a new concept kids, how about original AND funny. This piece of excrement lacks both.

The rest of the film has a series of predictable, played out, “comedic” scenes that would cause Jeffrey Dahmer to become a vegetarian. It’s dull, drab, and boring. On an Amish scale of 1 to 10, I give it 1 pitchfork. Did the movie going public do something to piss off the writers? The only thing that enabled me to sit and watch this crap was the fact that I finally hit the mute button and turned on my best of the 80’s metal cd and had Mrs. Origami smear mud all over herself and churn my butter. That is all for now, as it is time for me to plow.

Repent Sinners!!! Hear the words of the prophet DEE SNIDER who said; “I WANNA ROCK!”

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