Monthly Archives: September 2000

The Crew

This is not a funny movie. While many films would consider that a form of praise, it’s safe to assume that a comedy movie is shooting for a stronger endorsement. While the awful script makes it pretty obvious when you’re … Continue reading

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Scary Movie

I was hoping this movie would be the funniest spoof since History of the World Part 1. The genre was there: Trendy Horror Flicks. The family was there: The Wayans Family, who cracked me up in I’m Gonna Git You … Continue reading

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The Replacements

Chris Peddie…I feel your pain. Ol’ Rufus loves American football…but damn…couldn’t hollywood at least crank out a decent flick while they’re out there withouth all those friggin’ cameras, gaffers, best boys and whatnot?

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Me, Myself & Irene

We at moviesthatsuck.com constantly read amateur ramblings about the Farrelly brothers and their immature humor or how much of a moron Jim Carrey is.

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Autumn in New York

I’ll go out on a limb here and expose the impending hollywood crisis that is apparently being hidden from the public:

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Bats

I like watching people get eaten. In addition to porn, I also like watching people get eaten by monsters. Pick your phylum, it’s all good: rats, bats, cats, gnats, snails, quails, gerbils in the habitrails, germs, worms, alien sperms, hares, … Continue reading

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The Astronaut’s Wife

This movie is so damn slow, I think I got younger as I watched it. What is it with these pretentious big-budget “thrillers”? Why are they so afraid to actually try and scare people?

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Varsity Blues

Starring James Van Der Beek, John Voight, Amy Smart, Ali Larter, Paul Walker, Scott Caan, Ron Lester and Eliel Swinton. Directed by Brian Robbins, Running time:110 mins Hollywood apparently has to enforce the rule that once a year, everyone in … Continue reading

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Three Kings

If I were an Iraqi, and I saw the movie Three Kings, I believe I would tender my immediate resignation to 7-11 Inc., and begin an intense letter-writing campaign to the Warner Brothers movie division.

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Hollow Man

At first, I thought Hollow Man was going to be your typical, bloated-budget, mindless sci-fi flick, with a plot so stupid it’s insulting and characters who exist only to drape elaborate special effects upon.

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