Category Archives: movies that suck

The Replacements

Chris Peddie…I feel your pain. Ol’ Rufus loves American football…but damn…couldn’t hollywood at least crank out a decent flick while they’re out there withouth all those friggin’ cameras, gaffers, best boys and whatnot?

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Me, Myself & Irene

We at moviesthatsuck.com constantly read amateur ramblings about the Farrelly brothers and their immature humor or how much of a moron Jim Carrey is.

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Autumn in New York

I’ll go out on a limb here and expose the impending hollywood crisis that is apparently being hidden from the public:

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Bats

I like watching people get eaten. In addition to porn, I also like watching people get eaten by monsters. Pick your phylum, it’s all good: rats, bats, cats, gnats, snails, quails, gerbils in the habitrails, germs, worms, alien sperms, hares, … Continue reading

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The Astronaut’s Wife

This movie is so damn slow, I think I got younger as I watched it. What is it with these pretentious big-budget “thrillers”? Why are they so afraid to actually try and scare people?

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Varsity Blues

Starring James Van Der Beek, John Voight, Amy Smart, Ali Larter, Paul Walker, Scott Caan, Ron Lester and Eliel Swinton. Directed by Brian Robbins, Running time:110 mins Hollywood apparently has to enforce the rule that once a year, everyone in … Continue reading

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Three Kings

If I were an Iraqi, and I saw the movie Three Kings, I believe I would tender my immediate resignation to 7-11 Inc., and begin an intense letter-writing campaign to the Warner Brothers movie division.

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Hollow Man

At first, I thought Hollow Man was going to be your typical, bloated-budget, mindless sci-fi flick, with a plot so stupid it’s insulting and characters who exist only to drape elaborate special effects upon.

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The Haunting

The Haunting is like this really cool toy you’ve seen on TV, with all the gadgets and lights and sounds, but when you open the box and stick your hand in, it’s nothing but moldy cheese and smelly shit.

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Shaft (2000)

Samuel L. Jackson, Vanessa L. Williams, Jeffrey Wright, Christian Bale, Busta Rhymes, Dan Hedaya, Toni Collette, Richard Roundtree Directed by John Singleton Who is the man that they should have left as a 70’s movie icon?

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